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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24277999">Guillermo the Seducer</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Robotfvcker9000/pseuds/Robotfvcker9000'>Robotfvcker9000</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>What We Do in the Shadows (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, M/M, Mutual Pining, Neck Kissing, crushes mistaken as seduction, nandor is dumb, neck biting eventually, will add more tags later</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 00:54:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,121</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24277999</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Robotfvcker9000/pseuds/Robotfvcker9000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Thirty minutes pass sundown and Guillermo still hasn’t come back to my sleeping chambers. I haven’t seen Guillermo for thirty minutes…..and I miss him already. I don’t know what spell Guillermo has cast over me but he needs to uncast it immediately.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Guillermo/Nandor the Relentless (What We Do in the Shadows TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>62</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Thirty minutes pass sundown and Guillermo still hasn’t come back to my sleeping chambers. I haven’t seen Guillermo for thirty minutes…..and I miss him already. I don’t know what spell Guillermo has cast over me but he needs to uncast it immediately.</p><p>Over the last few weeks, months even I’ve noticed things. Before Guillermo was just another nobody, a human who had the privilege to be a vampire’s familiar. Now he haunts my every waking thought! His scent, which at times can get heady when I make him blush. Those stupid, ugly sweaters that he wears seem to hug and hold him just right. I would occasionally imagine him wearing something of mine, mostly a cape and nothing else, but I just chalk it up to wanting my scent and my scent alone on him. So that other vampires would know he’s mine, of course. My familiar.</p><p>“Guillermo! Come here please!”, why am I saying please. I don’t need to be polite, he has to do what I say.</p><p>Soon enough I hear a familiar heartbeat approaching my room. Recognizing one’s familiar heartbeat is probably common.</p><p>“Is everything alright Master?” Guillermo asks me as he walks into my room.</p><p>“You’ve been gone for too long!” I say before I think. Guillermo pauses in the doorway, I don’t like that.</p><p>“Come here.” I wave him towards me. He walks gingerly towards me and stops about a foot away. I don’t like that. “Closer.” I say. Guillermo hesitates, but comes closer. In the doorway I could smell his scent, but this close it overwhelms me. I like that.</p><p>“You’ve smelled very nice lately.” I see red rise up his neck and fight the urge to bite him.</p><p>“Um,” Guillermo starts.”I...bought some new deodorant.” he shuffles his feet awkwardly but doesn’t back away from me. I like that.</p><p>“Did you need something Master?” This time he backs away. “I still have a lot of chores to take care of.” He continues backing away, slowly towards the door. He pauses again in the doorway, before finally leaving my room altogther. I don’t like that.</p><p>I don’t like that I listen to his heartbeat as he goes back to whatever he was doing, dusting or sweeping in the hallway. I don’t like that I’m happy his scent lingers in my room. I don’t like that I look forward to seeing his face last before I go for slumber and first when I wake. Guillermo is my familiar, he shouldn’t be casting spells on me!</p><p>Although I don’t recall Guillermo even dabbling in magic. Maybe he didn’t cast a spell on me. The only other conclusion I can think of is that Guillermo is seducing me! He’s seducing me so that I would make him a my immortal vampire lover!</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The wrong advice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>At first a filler chapter but developed into something else</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>⁰Ever since my realization that my familiar is trying to seduce me I came up with the brilliant plan to do nothing. Guillermo currently doesn't suspect a thing. He doesn't know that I know that he's trying to get, as the humans say, under my belts. I'll let him think he’s succeeding.I follow the sound of Guillermo’s heart to the front door and see him putting on his shoes.</p>
<p>“Where are you going Guillermo?”, I ask.</p>
<p>“Hello Master. Oh, I was just going to the store to get some things to spruce up my room.”, he finishes putting his shoes on and heads for the door. What does he need to ‘spruce’ his room up for? It seems perfectly alright. Not too decrepit, a bit of a downer though. Unless...he wants the room to be romantic and sexy for when we finally do the do. I mean IF we do the do! I need to go with him….just because he would pick out stuff that would make his room more of a downer. There’s no other reason I am going with him.<br/>===========================================================================================</p>
<p>"What about this one master?", Guillermo holds up a pack of red light spheres. </p>
<p>“Yes, red lighting would be very sexy. Get that one.” Guillermo hesitates, but puts them in the cart anyways. Good.</p>
<p>Guillermo continues down into an aisle of frames for pictures. I just know he’s going to pick something very unsexy. He should care more about my opinion about how to decorate his room if he expects me to go down on him in a room as depressing as his, he needs to think again. I’ll just get him to come into my…..room.</p>
<p>Why am I thinking about such things!? Guillermo’s seduction must run deeper than I thought. He’s trying to make it seem like it will all be my idea! It was my idea to come with him. It was my idea to help him pick sexy room decorations. Guillermo is as smart as he looks. </p>
<p>“Ready to go Master?” Guillermo comes back comparing two frames, then just putting them both in the cart.</p>
<p>“Uh, yes. Guillermo, let us leave this place.”<br/>===========================================================================================</p>
<p>I am aware of Guillermo’s plan yet I do nothing! I just let him parade around the house in his sweaters and let him think his plan will carry on. I should punish him. I should let it be known that any dastardly sexy plan that involves me will not happen without me knowing! Nandor knows all! Nandor sees all! Nandor is smarter than he looks.</p>
<p>I’ve been seduced before, but not by a familiar. This is uncharted territory. I need….advice. Which is why I am waiting for Laszlo and Nadja to finish their lovemaking so that we can have an important conversation! Before I could knock loudly again one of them finally opens the door.</p>
<p>“Oh Nandor!” exclaims Laszlo, “Listening to us lovemaking again?” Laszlo smiles as if he knows everything.</p>
<p>"I don't do that! Stop saying I do that!" Nandor rushes past him into their bedroom. </p>
<p>Laszlo is wearing a robe, but Nadja is sprawled comfortably naked in their 'lovemaking' coffin. Nothing I haven't seen before unfortunately. </p>
<p>"My...friend has a problem." I tell them as I start to pace the room.</p>
<p>"Oh, really?" Laszlo says as Nadja speaks above him in the background. "Since when do you have other friends?"</p>
<p>"Yes I have another vampire friend."</p>
<p>"Yes, go on."</p>
<p>"And they have a familiar."</p>
<p>"Lots of vampires do."</p>
<p>"And they say they recently found out...uh" I finally stop pacing and look at them both. "That their familiar is trying to seduce them."</p>
<p>"Ew."</p>
<p>"Uh huh, that was my response. What should I do?"</p>
<p>"Like, what should you tell them?" Nadja asks.</p>
<p>"Yes that's what I said."</p>
<p>"Seduce them back!" Laszlo suggests. </p>
<p>"Punish them sexually!" Of course she would say that.</p>
<p>It was a mistake coming to them.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Would've had a chapter up sooner but my nieces keep asking for my laptop. <br/>Cashapp $AfroBisexual</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Based off a dream I had lol. That involved Nandor yelling "Stop seducing me Guillermo!"<br/>Cashapp $AfroBisexual<br/>each chapter will be longer than the last</p></blockquote></div></div>
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